so i was pregnant with twins. a boy and a girl. james and laura. or jake and layla. or chris and paula. anyway, my boyfriend was the father. but i still hadn't met his parents. and i knew they'd think i was a whore. i loved the attention. everyone loved me. because i was pregnant...and fat. and then i had the babies. and they were babies then they were puppies then they were babies then they were puppies, etc. except most of the time they were babies. and i kept losing them. and everyone threw a party for me for having the babies. but i kept misplacing them or accidently suffocating them in blankets or putting them on dangerous surfaces. and i couldn't hold both babies at once. i hadn't seen my boyfriend since i had the babies. and i kept losing him in the crowd. but i didn't really care. his parents probably definitely thought i was a whore.